For all our disenfranchised friends and floating accomplices, we offer an asylum program! This is your chance to become a True Scotsman, with our exclusive, highly coveted True Scotsman, Letter of Sanction - the License to Kilt.

There are a few rules and caveats you must adhere to, including near (fucking) constant (fucking) swearing and accepting the word of Billy Connolly as the absolute truth, but you'll get the hang of it in no time.

Those carrying a license to kilt will be granted freedom of movement across our border by FCKU.

You can view the Letter of Sanction here.